advice. They killed him. Nevertheless, here is some advice.
It's better, though harder, to listen than to tell other people how to fix their problems. If feedback is expected, offer some reassurance that you're listening.
If advice is asked for, take some time. Think hard before you give it.
Often you know that the advice you'd give, is not what they'd want to hear.
What people often want is just a hand to hold.
When you feel there's not much you can do, remember that a single candle can bring light to the darkness.
Once you've experienced physical pain or the terrible grief of loss, you realize that every day you wake up feeling fine is a wonderful day.
Be grateful every morning.
Show compassion for those less fortunate.
Parenting
Be the person you hope your children will be, while accepting that children, before they know who they are, just want to be the same as everyone else their age.
Play with them, hug them, listen to them, keep them safe.
Love matters most.
You teach a child to walk knowing that someday they will walk away.
It's good to let little ones know that when they fall down, you will be there to catch them, and to help them get up. But as children get older, parents have to learn to stand back.
Provide structure but expect them to do their own work.
Children need to learn that what they do or don't do will have a reward or a consequence in their own lives.
If your children argue with you, and they are wrong, say something like, "Nevertheless...." and repeat what you said before. My children didn't like it much when they thought I was being unfair and I stood my ground. But somebody has to be the parent, and it should be you.
Children will want all kinds of things because other children have them, or because advertising makes these things seem special. Often what they want today they don't want tomorrow.
Give them only what you can afford.
Be open about the family budget and teach them the important lessons of managing money. This is something usually not taught in school.
Let them learn to work and save for things they think they really want.
A child who knows he is loved and valued is richer than a child with a lot of things.
In addition to love, the best thing you can give a child is your time.
When you spend time with anyone, give them your full attention.
Put away your phone.
If you can't pay attention, don't think that your child will learn to pay attention.
Living a Happy Life
If you want to be content, appreciate what you have.
If you want to change the world, be brave and believe you can.
You reap what you sow.
What you give to the world returns to you.
So do no harm, be kind, and keep your heart open, all your life long.
Remember what brought you joy as a child, and do those things now.
Dance, draw a picture, make things.
Listen to the music of the world.
Sing your own song.
Spend more time in nature and do what you can to preserve it.
Watch and see that every moment of life is a miracle.
Plant seeds and tend a garden.
Cook your own food.
Walk more.
Cuddle.
Share your life with a dog or a cat.
Learn to swim.
"You drown not by falling in a river but by staying submerged in it," Jean Chretien said.
Take time to just float.
Lie on your back and gaze at the stars at night.
To find out where you want to go, close your eyes, spin a globe and point.
You will know if you want to be where your finger lands.
Life goes by quickly even when you don't live like it's a race.
Do something you enjoy every day.
Read and share books.
Words can change your life.
Words let you experience other worlds and understand other points of view.
The spoken word is powerful.
When you really wish for something, say it out loud.
Because words are powerful, be careful not to use them as a weapon.
Love as much as you can.
But don't fall in love with someone who doesn't or can't love you back.
People let you know who they are almost right away.
See them as they are, not as you hope they could be.
Accept that you can't change other people.
Love yourself enough to accept who you are.
Don't try to change yourself because someone else makes you feel you're not enough.
Think less about what you can get, and more about what you can give.
Know that the greatest gifts involve sacrifice: the gifts of life, love, forgiveness, the gift of your time.
Grief
Love creates a connection between souls. Grief is the pain experienced when a connection is broken. Grief is what you feel when that love no longer has a place to go.
The words heartache, heartbreak, heartsick suddenly make sense.
As she stroked the head of her dying dog, my daughter began to feel faint and nauseous, she was literally heartsick with grief. It doesn't make a difference if you lose a pet, parent, child, lover or friend to death or other circumstances, the loss of one you love is painful.
Grief doesn't get easier with age or experience. I know that losses over a lifetime can create cracks in your heart that make you feel truly heartbroken, even when this newest loss is expected, even when you have done all you can and know there is no hope.
The only thing to do when you are experiencing grief is to get up every day and just do what you have to do. Take it one step, one day at a time. Let yourself feel the pain. Cry your tears, but believe that this too shall pass. You'll always remember the one you loved, but it's true that time will lessen the pain of grief.
One day you will wake up feeling better.
Until then, take care of yourself.
Give yourself time to adjust to the loss.
